Hello world! Everything is on fire AND you’re being seduced! Do I have your attention? Either I do or you’re already gone. Effective however you look at it. Amazing. Welcome to my blog!

When I start little writing-projects like this, I like to begin with a statement of purpose, so here it is: This blog is a place for me to write anything and everything. Sounds pretty simple, I think. Not to mention super original. Nobody saw this coming. The focus here will be comedy (something I’ve been pursuing in one form or another for years) and copywriting (a pretty recent interest). Yes. Copywriting. I hope to make one post every week. Maybe every Friday.

Why am I doing this? Well, because I’ve been told in order to become a good writer, one must write often. So that’s what I’m going to do. First, write often. Then, hopefully write well. I expect the first couple (all of the) ┬áposts here will be utter garbage. You see, right now as I’m typing, I feel like I’m explaining myself pretty well. Eloquently even. But dang it! Every time I look back at something I wrote in the past, I can’t help but to cringe. I don’t know. Maybe everyone feels that way.

Anyway. I want to explain the gourds… A long time ago (about a week ago) I (my friend) came across a Buzzfeed article about creative applications for GOURDS. Like making them into lanterns or hanging them from your rear-view mirror. Anything but eating them. I thought to myself, “What a weird post.” Then I thought to myself, “It’s really not that weird. People write about fucking EVERYTHING. Especially these days. Gotta get those sweet sweet clicks.” So, if I’m going to have a blog where I write about anything and everything I might as well have a symbol, a metaphore, a MASCOT for it. And what better mascot than the oddly shaped, misunderstood gourd. So this blog is called All About Gourds. Expect anything and everything.

I want to say that I’m horrible.

I meant to write that I’m horrible at coming up with conclusions, but I stopped at horrible. It felt right. But yeah, I’m horrible at coming up with conclusions. “In conclusion, here’s what you just read.” It’s what we’re taught to write in school, but I’ve always thought, “Why should I have to re-explain myself? They JUST read it.” It’s probably because I never wrote anything long enough to need a summary at the end. And in that spirit, I’ll stop here.

Til next time!